Hollywood

For reasons only known by those that organised it, today was planned to visit Hollywood and walk down Hollywood Boulevard and the Walk of Fame. 

I say this because it is nearly a 2 hour trip in this horrendous traffic to travel 62 Km

The kids were about as interested as a sleeping dog would be interested in a passing cat, but we mananaged to get them to stay off Snapchat for 30-45 minutes whilst we walked looking at the stars in the pavement and the weirdos that make Hollywood famous. 

We eventually turned the corner and went down Hollywood Boulevard towards the famous Kodak Theatre as named by Tracy. (It was so famous that I had never heard of it by that name.)

This certainly taught the kids that their dad did actually know what he was talking about sometimes. 

We were about halfway down when we can across some characters dressed as Superman and Spider-Man. 

Grabbing the two boys that asked if they wanted some photos. 

Boys: Yeah ok

Me: NO

Boys: Why not?

Superheroes: Yeah - why not?

Me: NO!

Superheroes: C’mon just.......

Me: NO!

Boys: Why not

Me: Fine.... whipping out iPhone, takes two quick blurry photos

Superheroes: well done mate..... $10 each thanks. 

Me: Pi## off. That’s why I said no. 

The next 200 metres and 3 minutes had the superheroes being super dicks and accosting us and even grabbing the boys arms at one stage until I threatened them that I would take off my shirt and become the incredible blob and squash them both if they didn’t leave us alone. 

I think the boys now understand why I told them not to say yes to anyone for anything. 

Turns out I had the last laugh. The pictures weren’t blurry at all. 

The kids were reasonably shaken over the whole ordeal, so we got in the car and went exploring. 

We went to Mulholland drive and found a couple of lookouts where we could see the famous Hollywood sign and overlooking the rest of Hollywood. 

I wanted to see some of the famous million dollar streets, but quickly became lost ( which of course was 100% due to Tracy’s navigating 😎)

We finally managed to find our way to the famous Beverly Hills sign where we took a couple of photos and then decided that we really needed to start making our way home. 

My advice now - NEVER try to leave Hollywood after 4:30 if you need to go to the other side of LA. 

We tried a couple of alternate routes that according to Apple Maps would save us 5 minutes rather than going via the freeway 

This couldn’t have been more wrong. There must have been two million cars trying to pass through the same 200 sets of traffic lights up one way roads that had signals only letting 5 cars through at a time. I will NEVER complain about Adelaide traffic again ( ok I probably will, but this was just insane). 

After about 90 minutes, I managed to get onto a freeway ramp, only to be stopped instantly in line with the other 3 million cars that were trying to go out of LA. After much swearing and frustration and another 60 minutes , I finally reached our exit ramp - and drove straight past it. (Insert multiple expletives here). 

6 lanes of traffic - all of them basically stopped. 

We still had to get something for tea, and with my bladder fuller than the Nile River st the end of Winter, I left Tracy and the kids at the shop while I ran home avoiding a burst kidney by about 5 seconds. 

Universal Studios

Today was different but same. Only this time we had to navigate 2 million cars on these ridiculous freeways for over an hour to get to the other side of LA. 

As well as being a theme park, Universal Studios is all about movie production. I was living in hope this was going to be more than bouncing from ride to ride with Dylan. It nearly was. Nearly. 

Whilst we were waiting for the first ride, we got talking to a loud American employee who just “looooved” Aussies. He talked to us about all the things he and the rest of USA knew about Australia - riding kangaroos to school, eating vegemite by the spoonful, and watching Home and Away. 

He suggested we go through the Walking Dead exhibit. This turned out to be one of the scariest 2 minutes of our lives with zombies jumping out of hidden doorways at us and generally scaring the you know what out of us.  Kayla had made the brave (and ultimately correct ) decision to not go in  and waited outside for us. 

Then the rides started and Dylan’s adrenaline climbed quicker than the speed of the lift in the Guardians of the Galaxy. 

After many rides later I finally got time to give my heart a rest and we went into the “Water World” shoe where they have a full on production with explosions, jet skis and other powered boats. With the perfectly timed sound affects and the staged fighting, it was easy to see how movies can be made in a confined space yet appear to be across miles of area. 

It gets dark at about 5pm, and with the park closing at 6, we were still able to be treated with an amazing display of festive season lights and decorations 

Disney day 1

I am not sure who is more excited about today. Tracy or the kids. 

Disney at Christmas is apparently somehow more spectacular than usual. 

However, Dylan’s adrenaline has him bouncing around like a bottle of blow flies. We have to remind him every now and then that today is not all about him and the rides, but I get the feeling it is like talking to a bottle of blow flies.  We got there easily with some expert navigation from Tracy and some expert driving from me (probably didn’t need to write that because it is never any different!)

US$25 later, we were parked and on a shuttle bus to Disney. The car park is about 3km away and is one of about 10, around what appears to be an entire suburb owned by Disney. We learned later that on any given day there is an average of 40,000 people passing through the gates. 

We got through the gates, and the blow flies led us straight to the first ride of many for the day. Turns out I was wrong .... I mean not completely correct. Today was all about Dylan and all about the rides. I really need to somehow take the lid off that bottle. 

I did soon find out though, that my own inner adrenaline rush still exists, and I was very happy to spend the time going on every ride that he dared me to. Sometimes even twice. 

Splash Mountain turned out to be one of the funniest rides to go on, mainly at Tracy’s expense due to her getting soaked on the first ride and starting an Australian wet T-shirt competition - which she won easily. 

It gets dark here at 5pm in winter. This is a good thing because we get to experience the amazing Christmas lights early in the evening. 

Th stories we had heard were correct this place is amazingly beautiful as it lights up the evening. 

We were still exhausted so we chose to not stay late tonight. We have another 2 days on our tickets to savour the sights. 

Must stay awake

We have now been awake for almost 25 hours and it is 8:30am local time. 

The hire car we need to pick up is actually about 10km away and we get picked up from the airport by a bus that takes us to the location of the cars. Upon arrival, there are about 20 people waiting and in true customer service fashion, only 2 people servicing customers. 

Tracy gets in line whilst the boys and Kayla lay on the couch and immediately fall asleep. I pace the floor getting more frustrated by the minute by the stupidity of the business in not having more staff behind the counter. 

We finally get all the paperwork signed (which was in fact already pre-booked on line by Tracy the expert planner prior to arriving ) and get directed out the back door. 

We were greeted by 3 people standing around doing almost nothing (instead of helping out the front where it would have been beneficial), and told to “select any car from the fence over there” with a finger pointing to a line of cars 100m away. If that’s the sort of help we are to get this holiday, there is going to be one angry Aussie. 

We got a Dodge Caravan which is a mid sized SUV that was perfect for our bags and the 5 of us. 

Now comes the fun part. Driving on the wrong side of LA roads with 2 million Californians that don’t ever get out of their cars and don’t seem to move anywhere fast. There are multiple freeways crossing each other more than a bowl of spaghetti with 6 lanes each way that reduce to 2 then back to 6 and sometimes 4. I am sure it is just to confuse the foreigners like us. I am at a loss as to why they have speed signs.... you are either stopped or doing 140km/hr, I did my best to keep up without veering into the next lane, sometimes doing 110km/hr yet most times doing less than 15km/hr (along with everyone else .... not just because I was crapping myself with people swerving through traffic like they were part of the crazy road structure.) 

There is no reason for the slowing down other than there are more cars on the road than there are people in Australia. I got warned it was going to be crazy, but I hadn’t anticipated it to be this bad. 

As we arrived in the early morning with 25 hours of no sleep and our AirBnB isn’t ready till 4pm, we decided to head West to Santa Monica Pier and check out the beach. 

It was a slow day thanks to no sleep, but it was the only chance we were going to get to see this side of California

Finally we reached our limit and headed towards Santa Ana where we were staying. 

We stayed away from the freeways as much as we could and checked out some of the coastal towns and back suburbs. 

We found a supermarket to grab some basic supplies, then went to bed. It was only 7pm, but that was still an hour later than I ever imagined staying awake. 

Tomorrow (somehow) is a full day at Disney

The trip begins

After many months of planning, and many dollars later (more than I know how to express), we finally got to our early morning departure. 

Getting up at 3:45am, we bundled ourselves into the car and set off on our trip of a lifetime. 

Tracy’s parents had offered to drive down to the airport and meet us there at the incredibly early time of 5am so they could take our car home, saving us the very expensive alternate option of leaving it in the sun baked car park for a month. 

6:05 am arrived and we were in the air. We were facing the huge 55 minute flight to Melbourne as our 1st leg. If only all  our flights were to be that easy. We got a nice little feed of something resembling muesli with a separate pack of cranberries. One of the few airline foods that didn’t look like it had been on 3 flights already. 

Customs screening in Melbourne was way easier than I ever imagined. I almost got the feeling they were happy for me to leave the country. 

After a few hours of waiting, the not so easy 14.5 hour flight to LA was underway. 

I hereby let it be known, I will NEVER enjoy sitting in the middle of 3 seats for that length of time EVER again. 

Luckily Kayla was on my left giving me someone to pester and tell me off for talking to myself, with some middle aged female sitting to my right grumbling every time I spoke to myself or when I woke her up so I could go to the amenities. Speaking of which, the inwards opening door of those smelly little places in the plane does not understand the acrobatic manoeuvres that this not so flexible body needs to perform just to get in and lock the door. Never mind the art of hitting that floating ping pong ball I kept imagining was in the bowl that my knees were not so gracefully leaning on. 

After what seemed to be an eternity, and with about 40 minutes sleep in total, we arrived in LA. The land of people that need to get everywhere fast with complete disregard for whoever they bowl over in the process of trying to get there. Nearly 90 minutes after landing, we were almost through customs. It makes total sense to have about 1000 passengers off 3-4 international flights trying to get through about 20 customs officers. I mean why would you want to put extra staff on when you can make tired grumpy passengers who haven’t slept for 24 hours wait in a line for even longer, soaking up the aroma of all those sweaty armpits and bad breath. Makes total sense to me. 

The only funny part to the arrival was that my Aunty Colleen and Uncle Bob from sunny Queensland met us in the arrivals hall. That’s also a 15 hour flight away and they just happened to be departing LA today after visiting my cousin Ray (their son) and his family. The uncanny timing of their trip and ours gave us all something funny to talk about and discuss just how small this enormous world is. 

Next step is to pick up our hire car. But that is also the next blog entry. 

4WD learning

It dawned on me yesterday afternoon that the last time I put diesel in the car was before we left home. That was a lazy 400km ago, plus yesterday’s trekking through the easy 4WD track. Whilst I could survive the next day or so, it did mean that I probably wouldn’t make it back to the nearest bowser with the van in tow. 

So this morning, Tyler and I decided to head into Orroroo which was a not so pleasant 50+km away on a very dusty dirt road that took nearly 3/4 of an hour each way. 

We did eventually get back mid-late morning and everyone piled into the car(s) and we took off to do some real 4WD’ing. There was no holding back by the Hardy’s and they led us straight into one of the medium hard tracks

Despite some serious looking rocks and branches blocking our way, followed by some fairly decent slopes, Jerry the Jeep crawled over it all as easily as if it was bitumen. 

The views from the top of the hills were spectacular and thankfully there was enough of a breeze to keep the flies away. 

The trip back to camp was down the steepest of hills that gets closed when wet to avoid cars ending up sliding into the bottom of the mountain. I tried out the Descent control in the Jeep where the car drives itself downhill with my feet off all pedals - majorly impressed. 

What I wasn’t impressed about was going over a blind crest, rolling over a large rock that had a hidden hole on the other side. The sound of that rock hitting the underside of the car was enough to make a proud Jeep owner cry. Turns out it was just the brackets holding the side step rails onto the car, but they are now horizontal instead of the required vertical, so I am going to have some repair work to do soon I guess. 

Definitely earned a bourbon or 3 tonight. 

Think the Hardy’s might have struck a major blow however with their MUX no longer able to engage 4WD High or Low. 

Should have bought a Jeep!  

To the Flinders we go

After what seems like an eternity, both Tracy and I have a week off work for school holidays and we are off to the Flinders Ranges for a week. Bendleby Ranges is about 4.5 hours from home according to Google Maps, so I am allowing well over 5. 

We didn’t leave till after 1 as Kayla had Cheer competition and presentations this morning. Tyler had hitched a ride with the Hardy’s on Friday night as he was refereeing at the Country Carnival for Soccer where Ned was also playing. In return, we had Patrick stay with us and banned him from having a shower so that he smelled not so good for when we reunited. They were then driving onwards to meet us at Bendleby on Monday. 

We got to the reception area at about 6:15 just as it was getting dark. The super friendly bloke who can to hook us in simply showed me in a map where we were staying and said to hurry up because we won’t find our way in the dark. 

I soon realised that he wasn’t joking, I was glad that we now had an off road caravan and car, and that his version of “everything is signposted” is a little far fetched. 

We stopped at what we assumed was the correct spot, and set up in the dark. 

Morning arrived after an early night, and it turns out we were in the right spot and very lucky to be in the middle of nowhere yet right where we need to be. 

This morning we went for a walk up the mountain side to take in the amazing views and to be chased by one of the local goats. The Hardy’s arrived at around lunch time and the kid population exploded almost as quickly as the flies arrived. 

I took off the 7km back to the reception area to pay and get some more information on the 4wd tracks with Dylan beside me, thanks to his supposed restrictive moon boot stopping him from climbing the mountain side again. 

The tracks looked inviting and “easy” so Dylan and I turned left and went for a drive. An hour later we emerged, a little pumped and a bit more confident in the capabilities of Jerry the Jeep. 

Wine O’clock arrived, only this time without any food, or wine (maybe it was just me with some bourbon...)

The fire got lit, dinner was cooked and a night of chatter began. 

Dancing in the sunset

The wind was getting stronger as nightfall arrived and was looking to becoming a crappy night. 

The kids were full of energy and didn’t let the cold, the wind or the darkness get in the way of their need to run, so they headed off to the grassy reserve across the road. 

The sunset was once again amazing, and cannot be shown properly in photos (well not my photos anyway)

The wind picked up overnight, just like it promised to. So much that after being woken up 3 times, I finally wandered outside in my “camping boxers” and packed everything up, including the awning that was holding strong but forever threatening to blow away with the next gust. 

When we finally emerged in the morning to a much calmer (but still windy) day, we were now faced with rain showers rolling in and forcing the pack up to be a whole lot quicker than originally planned. We did beat the wet though (well technically it never arrived....) and were off homeward bound after another good week not at work and not at home

Fishing where there’s no fish

I agreed to take Dylan fishing off the local jetty yesterday morning , and dragged Tyler and Kayla along too, letting Tracy have a sleep in. 

The weather was perfect, the water was perfect and the wind was fairly bearable. If only someone told the fish to join us. Despite our efforts, there was not a single fish to be seen other than a few nuisance puffer fish that were probably all of 6cm long and were happily feasting on our bait. 

We stuck it out for nearly 2 hours before admitting defeat and skulking back to the van for a well needed Weber breakfast of bacon and eggs. 

The day then took us exploring slightly north to a place called The Granites - this was literally 4-5 granite boulders on the beach surrounded by absolutely nothing else. The good thing about the location was that we could drive onto the beach and do a bit of exploring and getting the feel of Jerry the Jeep on the sand. I was still a bit cautious thanks to the incoming tide, the looming storm clouds and no sign of anyone else to help if I got stuck, so it was a bit tame, but enough to feel how the car handled the soft sand. 

We had some lunch back at the van, then headed into Robe for a gander. 

The beach at Robe is as amazingly clear as ever, but still windy and cold, so we spent an hour or two walking around looking at the local shops whilst letting the kids expel some of their built up energy at the foreshore. 

The weather was forecast to be getting windier over the next few days, so at this stage it appears we may be simply amusing ourselves at camp for tomorrow. 

Morning arrived and as we always try to do, we were up at 6am and heading off to the local RSL War Memorial for Anzac Day tribute. The kids have done this nearly every year of their life now and are very respectful and understanding. Pity the same can’t be said about Taz who displayed a little too much interest in another dog who had joined the back of the crowd. 

Mid morning saw us all pile into the car with a couple of beach rods in the hope of getting a Salmon or two on one of the beaches we drove along yesterday. It took a whole two casts to work out the only thing we were going to catch was a bucket load of seaweed. We tried several spots over a distance of about 10km up the beach, but it was no use. The weed was thicker than my waistline after too many Weber cook-ups. 

One of the highlights for the kids was letting them drive Jerry up the beach. Yes, completely illegal, but hey, what could possibly go wrong. Well we found out when a car pulled up to us to talk whilst Tyler was driving, and it was at this moment I found out Tyler didn’t actually know how to brake. When he did finally put his foot on the pedal, we stopped so suddenly that my noggin got thrown against the windscreen as the car changed from 40km/hr to 0 in about 2 metres on soft sand. Maybe we should have been wearing seatbelts. Or.... maybe I shouldn’t have been letting my 14 year old be driving a $60k + car on a public beach. 

A late lunch (on the Weber of course) marked the end of our touring and a lazy day followed. The wind was picking up and we could tell it was going to be a cold messy night. 

I did manage to get out and take a few photos of Larry the Lobster before tea just because I could. (And as Kayla was the only one that agreed to come with me, she of course featured in my photo shoot as well!)

Tomorrow is pack up day. At this stage it appears we won’t get wet before we leave, but I am really hoping we get a tail wind helping the drive homeward.